Not Enough
by aedy
Summary: "What do you want?" "I want you to suffer. I want your life."
1. Not Enough

_**Disclaimer**__: I don't own Torchwood_

Gray's hand found its way through the soft auburn hair of the head currently lying across his lap.

"I killed his friends and I am about to kill the girl he was protecting and John but I still can't get enough. You seemed all very important to him." He looked down his eyes studied the soft lips that were slightly apart. His fingers brushed against them. "All this, doesn't seem enough for everything I've been through. It was his entire fault."

Behind the closed eyelashes of the man in his arms, the pupils started to move frantically and finally, those blue orbs were looking back at him once again. The fire in them was gone replaced by slight confusion. "What…"

A tear slipped down Gray's face and landed on Ianto's. "I'm going to take you with me." He opened the transport control on his right wrist and pressed a button.

Just as Jack finally made it to the cells, Gray and Ianto disappeared.


	2. Impasse

A big thank you to my amazing betareader Carol!

* * *

"Where are we?" Ianto looked around but all he could see was dark and a faint light at the end of an alley.

"We needed a place," Gray closed the transport control on his wrist and glanced at Ianto. He seemed to study the older man with great interest. "Did he ever do something to you that hurt so much you wanted to see him suffer?"

Ianto looked at him, sharply, with anger in his eyes. "I don't know what you want from me, but I'm not discussing **him** with you."

"Why? After all I am his brother."

The two men held each other's glance for a long time and looked away only when a sound in the distance captured their attention.

"Are you going to get us killed?"

Gray shook his head. "This is where John took me after he rescued me."

"In a dark room?" Ianto took a couple of steps closer to Gray. "And this is the first place where Jack is going to come looking for us."

"He won't come. He never does." Gray started walking towards the light at the end of the alley and Ianto found himself following him thinking that it didn't matter what that madman said, he knew that Jack would come for him.

"Shouldn't you tie me up or something? I could escape."

"You have no way to go back to your time. Plus, I'm not holding you hostage."

"How can you say that?"

"Because I haven't tortured you and I am not planning on giving you back to him in exchange of something."

"Then…"

Gray stopped and turned around. "I am not crazy," he said in a steady tone. "I am not going to rape you and kill you just to make him suffer." He sighed and his hand found its way up to Ianto's face cupping his cheek gently. "I am not a monster."

"You killed my friends and Jack and…"

"He can't die."

"It doesn't matter." Ianto took Gray's hand in his and pulled it away from his face.

"He will suffer knowing that I have you. I heard when you told John to put Jack on. Your tone…" he trailed off and shook his head. "You really care about him, I could even go as far as to say that you love him. But Jack?" he gave a humorless laugh, "He will never tell you what he feels and in the end, he will let go of your hand and leave you behind."

"Jack is not like that, not anymore. I was there at night when he would dream about you, calling your name. You don't know what he's been through. You may think that you're life has been hard but he's been taking the blame for everything for the last century."

Gray took a step closer invading Ianto's personal space and even if there wasn't any light, the Welshman could almost see the expression that was now on the shorter man's face just from the tone he used when he spoke. "Did he ever leave you alone? Letting you fend for yourself?"

Ianto looked away. He thought back about Jack's disappearing act and how he never said what had happened. Not a thing, not even to Gwen.

"I guess I will take your silence as a yes." Gray turned around and started walking again. "You coming?"

"Do I have a choice?" Ianto asked starting to follow him again.

"Yes, you can leave but it would be pointless. You don't have a way to contact my brother or have any weapons on you."

"If you want to hurt Jack, you should torture me or kill me and send my fingers to him or…"

"He doesn't know what I'm going to do. He's probably thinking that I'm torturing you right now. But the fact that he's wondering what I'm going to do with you, will hurt him even more than actually knowing it. And even if he's sure that I'm going to kill you or torture you, it doesn't mean that I'm actually going to do it. I just want him to think that I have you, that he can't save you."

They stayed in silence after that. Ianto kept looking around in search of a way to escape, something he could use as a weapon, but it was dark and he could barely make out Gray's form in the dim light coming from the end of the alley.

"I just don't want to be alone anymore."

"What? You are expecting me to develop Stockholm Syndrome and fall in love with you? Because that's not going to happen."

"But I won't give you reasons to hate me either."

Ianto thought that he already did. He had kidnapped him and took to an unknown galaxy or unknown time and he had killed Tosh, Owen, half of Cardiff and Jack. But he didn't say anything. He just kept on following Gray.


	3. Way In, Way Out

When they get to the end of the alley, Ianto noticed that where he had seen the light was actually a door.

Gray glanced at him for a moment before opening the door and walking inside.

Ianto was stunned to see that they were in what looked a lot like an Earth night club except for the fact that the dancers had green skin with blue wings attacked to their backs.

"This is where John took you?" Ianto rolled his eyes and didn't really sound surprised. "I should have seen this one coming."

"It's a special club. You can't fight here because it's as if the whole planet is a lounge area. Aliens come here to seal deals, to bargain and sell stuff." Gray started walking and Ianto quickly followed him.

"Why did John bring you here?" he found himself asking when they reached a door on the other end of the club.

"Because the Time Agency used to come here a lot. He didn't tell me the reasons why, though."

Gray grabbed Ianto's wrist without saying anything else before opening the door. "We can stay here for a while then we will decide where to go."

Ianto pulled his hand away as soon as they had stepped inside a room. The door behind them closed on itself and the noises of the club were drowned out. The Welshman looked around noticing that they were standing in the center of a large circular room with countless doors.

"What…"

"It's some kind of a hotel" Gray told him. "We will take a room for the time being."

"I don't want to travel around with you, Gray."

Gray just ignored him and walked over to one of the doors. He knocked lightly and a yellow hand slide out from what looked like a mail slot and he deposited what appeared to be coins in the hand before it disappeared back inside the slot and the door clicked open.

Ianto found himself asking, "They take Earth cash?" He knew that he had to be at least a little bit scared of everything but he couldn't help himself from trying to gain as much knowledge as he could; he was a researcher after all.

"No, it's from this planet but it looks a lot like yours. John won it at poker. So, Ianto, what do you say? The great thing about this place is that the rooms will look exactly like the person's birth planet." Gray walked inside the room and the Welshman followed him once again noticing how the door was closing on itself. He studied it for a few seconds trying to understand from where the hand had come out.

When he turned around, he found Gray pulling out of the dresser fresh clothes and laying them down on the bed.

"This was the room John picked and since I knew I would be back, I left some clothes here because I only travel with this attire. Before leaving I told the aliens to keep this room for me," Gray explained before glancing at Ianto. "But what I didn't know was that I'd find someone like you. Someone who actually mattered to my brother and take him away from that piece of shit. If I had known, I would have picked some clothes for you too."

Ianto stared in his green eyes for a few seconds before sighing and sitting down on the edge of the bed turning his back to the shorter man. "You know, you're awfully wordy for someone who's been through hell." He honestly didn't know why he said that since he didn't have any intention to talk to him and was quite surprised when Gray sat down next to him.

"I've spent years surrounded by bodies, screams, pain and death. Now I want to catch up, I want to know people and talk to someone besides myself."

Ianto glanced at him and found Gray staring down at the floor. "And you want to do all that by killing and kidnapping people? You killed my friends and, bloody hell, you forced John to destroy Cardiff."

"He didn't want to help me otherwise!" Gray looked sharply at Ianto, fury blazing in his eyes. "I had no other choice."

"You expect me to tell you that that's okay?"

"Ianto," he grabbed the Welshman's face between his hands, "imagine just for a second that when you were little, your brother, who was supposed to protect you, whom your father had told to protect you, abandoned you. You wait and wait but he never comes, nobody saves you. You wait and dream of being saved, of knowing something beside all that despair but nothing ever changes. Day after day it's the same old story. And when you finally find him again, he's happy, he has a life, people that loves him and people he can love in return and…"

Ianto freed himself from the man's hold and sprang to his feet. "I am not going to be on your side, Gray. Nothing can justify what you did so don't waste your breath."

They held each other's gaze for a while and finally Gray broke into a grin. "You're not scared, are you?"

Ianto shrugged. "No. I've faced worse than crazy people."

"Good," Gray got up from the bed and turned his back to Ianto. "I'm going to take a shower and change into something more wearable than this thing I have on right now. You can try to escape," he glanced at the other man from his shoulder. "The door isn't locked, but as I said before, it would be best for you not to wander around." He walked up to what Ianto presumed was the bathroom door and stopped without turning around. "You really think he's a saint?"

"No one is a saint."

"Then what makes him so different from me? Do you know of everything he has ever done? Of the time he spent with John? He's twisted and I'm sure John wasn't lying when he said that."

Ianto didn't want to listen to him but while the other man closed the door behind him, he couldn't help but think of when Jack had wanted him to kill Lisa and when he had used Myfanwy against her.

No one was a saint, he knew that, not even he was one. He had betrayed people just like everyone else, he had wished Jack dead, had disliked Gwen just because Jack used to flirt with her…

He shook his head to stop himself from thinking like that.

* * *

The water had been running for quite a while when Ianto finally decided to take a chance for an exploration of the place.

He glanced towards the bathroom's door still firmly shut and got up from the bed where he had been laying and walked over to the door. As soon as his hand was on the handle, a metallic voice echoed around the room.

"Have a good night, Sir."

Ianto looked towards the bathroom and sighed in relief when the water's noise didn't stop. "Bloody aliens," he muttered before opening the door and walking out. He glanced at the numbers on the door and memorized them before walking over to the door that took to the main club.

This time he took his time to notice how many different aliens species were sitting at the tables and dancing on the dance floor, and to take in the colorful décor so sexy in the dim lights.

Someone bumped into his shoulder and he looked up coming face to face with a woman, or at least an alien that looked very much alike an Earth woman, even though she had pale green skin.

"Hey Gorgeous, are you alone?"

Ianto gulped and told himself not to be surprised that he could understand what she was saying. He guessed that since the bedrooms took on a different aspect for each species, then perhaps there was something that made you understand each language.

"Cat got your tongue?" the alien passed her arms around Ianto's neck and brought him closer.

"Sorry, I am here with someone," he replied politely stepping out of her embrace.

"What a shame," she whispered before moving away.

The Welshman glanced around in search of the bar and once he had found it, he made his way there trying not to bump into anyone.

The barman had three sets of arms which Ianto was sure came in handy when so many customers were around.

"What can I get you?"

"Do you have Earth alcohol?"

The bartender nodded briefly before depositing the cocktails he was preparing on a tray that a waiter of the same species came to retrieve. "Of what century?" he then asked Ianto who frowned.

"What century are we now?" he asked.

"In Earthyears, it's 3029. So, what century?"

Ianto sighed. "Just a Tequila from the 21st."

"Coming right up."

He glanced back over his shoulders and thought about Jack and grinned for a moment. He knew that if the older man was in his place, he would have taken up the alien's offer and made the best out of it.

He wondered in that moment what was happening back on Earth, if John was still in the Hub, if Gwen was okay and if Jack had already noticed his absence.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when the bartender put down several shots of Tequila in front of him.

Ianto frowned and glanced up arching one perfect eyebrow.

The alien shrugged, "they're from some people that saw you. You know, it's a night club after all," he said before walking over to some other customer.

The Welshman was about to take his first shot when he felt a hand on his shoulder. For a moment he thought that it was Gray but the hold was strong and bruising and rooted him on the stool like a gun to his head would have done.

"You know Hart?" a voice whispered in his ear.

Ianto sighed and glanced over his shoulder but was stopped from moving when something that felt suspiciously like a gun was pressed in his back making him roll his eyes. "Why is it always me?" he muttered under his breath before finally looking back.

"So, do you?"

"I wouldn't exactly say that I know the man," he replied cautiously noticing that his assailant had the head of a shark.

"He owes me money."

"I am sure that when he comes back…"

"I saw you with that boy that was with him last time."

"And I thought no one could carry weapons on this planet," Ianto said ignoring the alien's rant.

"Well, if you're smart enough you can. Where is that boy and where is Hart?"

"I am here." Even with the music pumping around him, Ianto heard the gun being prepared to shoot and above that, Gray's cold tone. "John isn't available right now, sorry," and next thing Ianto knew there was blue blood on the side of his face.

He turned around quickly, "What the…"

"I've just saved your life you know."

"By killing someone else!"

Gray grabbed Ianto's arm, "look, we don't exactly have time for this right now. We have to get away." He quickly opened the transport control on his wrist and hold tight to Ianto before pressing a button.

Ianto felt himself being pulled and pushed and his head felt dizzy, when he finally felt ground under his feet, he fall onto his knees.

"Yeah it gets a while to get used to. Now, why did you leave the room?"

The Welshman looked up and noticed that Gray's hair was still dripping with water and he was now wearing jeans and a white t-shirt. Ianto couldn't help but arc an eyebrow at his attire.

"I had to go to your rescue when I came out of the bathroom and you were gone," Gray said looking away and sighing. "I told you not to wander around, you stupid 21st Century man."

Ianto scowled. "Listen, you kidnapped me and I wanted to see at least where the hell we were!" He got to his feet and stood in front of the shorter man.

"You happy now?" Gray asked sarcastically and Ianto couldn't help but punch him. He didn't even know he wanted to hit him until his fist connected with the other man's chin making him stagger backwards.

"Now I am," he said. "Look, take me home, okay?"

Gray looked sharply at him. "No. Like it or not, I'm not going to hand you back to him. Are we clear?" He used a menacing tone but Ianto just looked at him.

"We have already established that I am not scared of you."

"I just saved your life, remember?"

"Yeah and I was risking it in the first place because you brought me here!" Ianto closed his hands into tight fists.

"Ianto, I am not ever going to give you back. Ever," Gray took a step forward and the fury glazing in his eyes rooted Ianto to the spot and it wasn't because he was scared by him, but because he knew that Gray meant every single word and that chances were that he was going to be killed away from the man he loved, his friends, his planet and his time just because this madman had some unfinished business with Jack. He felt so powerless that he was starting to get angry at himself; he wanted to bang his head in a wall and beat the shit out of Gray all at the same time.

"And we're on Earth." Gray's voice was light and followed by a sigh. "And I think you know now that you can trust me."

"I will never trust you," Ianto replied in the same dull tone. He looked around himself and sighed. "Where are we?"

"Earth, 1612, France."

Ianto nodded and sat down on the grass. "I feel like one of the Doctor's companion."

"Who?" Gray asked sitting down besides him.

"Just who's apparently the Number 1 enemy of Torchwood and of course Jack's friend. He has the habit to take men or women with him and take them all around the universe. But he's good actually," he glanced briefly at Gray noticing how the boy frowned slightly. "But from what I read in the archives, he wasn't always like that. Apparently, things changed when he got together with the companion he had when we first met."

"You met him?"

"Briefly, back in London while a lot of people were dying," he replied shortly not wanting to get into the details of Canary Wharf and everything that followed. "But Jack doesn't exactly know. Anyway…" He looked towards the hill in the distance and saw a countrywoman coming their way. He got up and looked down at Gray, "we have to move. I just wish you would tell me what exactly you're going to do with me. We can't keep going around in time and space without a destination."

"We will find something to do with ourselves." Gray replied getting up as well. "Maybe you will change me like that woman did to Jack's doctor."

"I seriously doubt I am going to fall in love with you and bring the best out of you." Ianto started walking towards the forest and Gray's eyes lingered briefly on him before following the Welshman.


	4. First Step

_**A/N: I'm so sorry it took me this long to update. I thought I had posted this chapter months ago. Sorry! **_

* * *

"We have to do something," Jack slammed his fist down on the desk and Gwen flinched.

"Jack..."

"You won't be able to find him, Jack," John took a step forward and looked straight into the Captain's eyes. "Until Gray decides that he has had enough, he won't return your precious Eye Candy back."

Jack took John by his shirt and slammed him against the wall. "I am not going to abandon him, OK? And I should kill you for bringing Gray back here when you knew he was crazy!"

"He's not crazy," John shoved Jack back and straightened his jacket. "He wanted to find you to have his revenge. It's not about being crazy, it's about being heartless and considering what happened to him I don't even think you could say that."

"He killed two of my team's and kidnapped another one," Jack hissed.

"Then why didn't you kill him when you could?"

"Because I'm not a monster."

John arched an eyebrow. "Really?" he asked sarcastically. "I think to remember..."

Jack pushed him into the wall once again. "I'm not like you anymore and I will do everything to get him back."

Gwen took a step forward and gently placed her hand on the Captain's shoulder. "Jack," she said quietly. "We need to think clearly if we want to find him. We need someone that will know how to work Tosh's computer." When the man didn't say anything but kept glaring at John, Gwen tightened his grip on his shoulder. "Killing him won't resolve our problem."

Few minutes went in silence before slowly, Jack loosened his hold on Hart's jacket and stepped back. "You're right. We will lock John up and then we will find a way to get Ianto back."

"We have to," she said with a sad smile. They had already lost too much that day. "We should take care of Tosh first."

Jack barely nodded before taking hold of John again to drag him back inside the cell. "If I won't be able to find him, I will kill you." He turned his back to the man and left.

John watched him go before sliding down on the floor sighing. When he had found Gray, all he had seen was a chance to have Jack back because that was all he wanted to see; the boy broken beyond repair wasn't something useful for his cause so he just didn't acknowledge it. He wished now that he did. Killing half of his team wasn't something that would get John back into Jack's graces and now that Ianto was missing, he knew that he was going to be lucky enough to get alive out of that situation.

-TW-

A trail of blood went from Tosh's workstation down to the Med Bay, that was the first thing Gwen saw stepping into the main Hub. They had heard a gunshot and simply thought that Tosh had to be dead. Now, as she quickly ran down into the Med Bay, Gwen hoped with all herself that her friend could still be alive. Because having lost Owen was already unbearable.

What Gwen saw made her heart broke. Tosh was propped up against the autopsy table, a cloth pressed on her stomach and her PDA abandoned on the floor. She wasn't moving and her eyes weren't focused on anything, there wasn't any trace of life in them and sobbing, Gwen walked closer to her and sat down next to her unmoving body grasping one of her hands.

"Tosh..." she whispered brokenly. "I'm so sorry." She closed her eyes against the image of the lifeless body and was startled when the hand she was gripping twitched. Gwen opened her eyes and almost smiled when a moan escaped Tosh's lips. "Tosh! Oh my God you're alive." Quickly she took a new cloth and pressed it down on Toshiko's stomach. Then, she yelled for Jack at the top of her lungs. "Hold on, Tosh."

"Ow... Owen," Tosh sobbed turning her head towards Gwen. Her eyes were still empty and tears were floating down her face. "Owen..."

"He's..."

"I should be dead," she said. "Oh God, Owen. He was alone and..." she trailed off brokenly. "I should be with him in the darkness," she added.

The sound of hurried footsteps echoed through the Med Bay and Gwen glanced over her shoulder to check that it was Jack.

"What..." Jack stopped when he saw Tosh and Gwen and quickly got to the girls and kneeled down on the floor.

"We have to take her to a hospital, do something. She's loosing too much blood."

"Toshiko," Jack said softly.

"He... shot me... sto... stomach," her voice was growing weak.

"Don't worry, we will save you." Jack looked down at the wound in her gut and tried his best not to start crying. "We won't loose you too."

"Ian... Ianto... ok?" she tried to ask.

"He's alive," Gwen said glancing at Jack. "But we need your help to find him so don't you dare dying, ok?" She tried her best not to start paniking. "We need you Tosh," she sobbed.

Jack tried to think clearly knowing that a wound to the stomach was pretty much always lethal. Then, out of the blue, the imagine of Ianto laying lifeless in the water came up in his mind. Ianto had been dead at the time thanks to Lisa and he had been able to bring him back; Tosh was still alive not matter how weakly and he had to believe that it would have worked.

"I'm going to kiss you Tosh." He smiled. "I mean, I've kissed everyone on this team except you."

Gwen looked at him confused but Jack didn't pay attention to her. He put his right hand under Tosh's head and quickly closed the gap between them sealing their lips all the while praying that it was going to work; it **had** to work.

Gwen looked at them as if understanding what the Captain was trying to do. She pulled the cloth away from Toshiko's stomach and lifted her sweater watching as the skin under the blood slowly closed. "Oh God," she whispered glancing up at Jack while he pulled away.

He looked down and sighed. "It worked," he muttered.

"Owen is dead," was the only thing that Tosh was able to say.

"But you're here," Jack told her firmly. "And I know that he would never **never**, wish otherwise."

"It was horrible," Toshiko sobbed. "He was at the Power Station. Ianto and I should have gone there but there were the Weevils and he wouldn't let us go and..."

"Tosh!" Gwen used the most firm tone she could master. "Owen died to save the city, to save **us** and you need to think about this. Ianto is missing, Gray took him and we need you to help us find him."

"He took Ianto?"

"Yes."

Tosh glanced at Jack trying to get to her feet but she was still too weak. "He had a wrist strap like yours Jack," she said.

"I know."

"I can truck it but it's going to take time. He could do anything to him, Jack."

"I know," the Captain repeated. "But we have to do our best and get him back even if it's going to take years. I won't abandon him."

"**We** won't abandon him," Gwen corrected him. "But first you need to rest, Tosh."

"I..."

"No, she's right," Jack said helping the woman to stand up. "And you too Gwen, go to Rhys and let him see that you're ok. I will come up with a cover story and clean around here. Tomorrow I want you here early."

"Jack, you shouldn't have to do everything on your own," Gwen said.

"This is all my fault. Stop," he held up a hand stopping both women from interrupting him. "I know it's my fault and I don't need to hear otherwise. We have to concentrate on getting Ianto back and if we want to find him, we have to be on top form. Tosh," his expression became sadder. "Owen..."

"There's nothing left, Jack." She replied quietly. "His body was melt in the..." She trailed off unable to continue.

The Captain nodded and with Gwen's help they got Tosh to the main Hub.

"Why don't you come home with me, Tosh?" The Welshwoman asked. "I'm sure that neither of us wants to be alone tonight."

"It's a good idea," Jack said. "You can call Rhys and get him to come pick you up."

"Thank you Jack," Tosh said when they were finally sitting down in the old couch in front of her workstation. "You saved me and..."

"I wish I had thought of that when Owen died."

"We were all in shock," Gwen said voicing what everyone was thinking. "We need a lucid mind this time."

"We will get him back," Tosh said to both Gwen and Jack. "I'll do everything I can and we will find him and bring him back. We won't lose anyone else."


End file.
